You can't have positive feelings when you have negative thoughts. Nor can you have negative feelings when you have positive thoughts. So the idea then is to change the way you think so that you can change the way you feel which will in turn will change they way you interact with your spouse.

I get so many couples in my office who are discouraged and ready to give up and they have been married less than 2 years. This is because their expectation is that, "we should not be having this much difficulty in the beginning. It shouldn't be this hard!" Truth is, most people go into marriage thinking that the best days should be at the beginning and then it tapers off from there. On the contrary, marriage gets better as time passes.

Many people do not go to couple's therapy because they do not know what to expect. Some couple's feel like they are beyond help. And then some couple's believe that they should be able to work through their own problems without a third person. If you have questions about couple's therapy this you should read this.

Is Love enough to sustain a thriving marriage? What does that kind of Love look like? Most people want to be in love but very few are interested in actually Loving the way Love requires. Pride, fear and ignorance are the reasons that Love cannot flow freely in our marriages. But Love is enough...let me explain why.

Often times we see beautiful marriages and we treat them like the homes in a new neighborhood. We see all of the outward beauty and we say, "I want a marriage like that one day!" (Sadly, even married people look at other marriages wishing they had what another marriage has). But we see these beautiful marriages we never think about what it took to make it beautiful.

Most men go through life trying to figure out relationships via trial and error. Being a "good man" does not equate to relational IQ. Men are typically not taught how to share their softer emotions so their needs often go unmet because they are incorrectly expressed through anger or not expressed at all. We all know that just because a need goes unexpressed does not mean that the need goes away.

Who should handle the money when you get married? How many bank accounts should you have? Who will determine how the money is spent? These are common questions that come up in marriage but are never actually addressed directly.

Too often we send signals that we expect the other person to interpret. We don't share our true feelings but we expect our partners to decipher our true needs.

It is impossible to have an intimate relationship without conflict. As a matter of fact, the absence of conflict means that the relationship is not intimate. But unresolved conflict can ruin a relationship. Hopefully this will give you some guidance on making your relationship better.