In relationships people expect you to just believe in them with no evidence or action for you to attach your belief to. But it is interesting to me that Jesus did not expect those who believed in him to do so with blind faith. The book of John tells us over and over that "Jesus did this so that they would believe.

It is a mistake to believe that because you are in a love relationship then "works" doesn't matter. That is how people get comfortable in marriage, thinking that because your spouse loves you then you don't have to work at being "good" or even better than good.

I think it's the same reason a kid from extreme poverty will succeed on the court and the kid from the middle class won't. The kid from poverty is afraid to get comfortable. The middle class kid will work as hard as his comfort will allow. In the same way, spouses get comfortable and stop pushing for "next level connection" because they feel they already have the prize so they are comfortable. "I mean, I COULD learn to treat you the way you'd like to be treated, but I already have you so." God forbid they be Christian because now the Bible says you have to love me no matter what.

All you are doing is making it easy for the clean-up man/woman. It may not be right but it's real. People are going to do what they want to do, but don't make it easy for them to give up on you. Don't get so caught up in what YOU think about you, or even what God thinks about you but listen to what your spouse thinks of you. You may be living FOR Christ but you are WITH your spouse. If your spouse has had the same consistent complaint then maybe you should listen and try to address it. Do not let your relationship coast on autopilot and do not let the absence of major conflict make you think everything is fine.

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